Friends, it's time to break into Jeff Bezos' bunker and steal his porn. Jeff Bezos – sorry! I mean J### B#### – he doesn't need porn anymore because he's dead.
Unfortunately, the bunker is now full of “RICH MAN'S DEADLY RADIATION”, making it unsafe for humans. Luckily, the People's Committee of Perverts has provided us with some remote controlled drones that are capable of shooting clones of themselves in the direction of the camera. To protect yourself from B#### bunts, you must accordingly point and click your mouse around the surprisingly soft and hazy boundaries of the bunker.
Beware of the purple sentinel robots that roam the alcoves and become hysterical at every ball-shaped intruder they come across. Also be sure to remove drones as the game progresses: each one you spew is tied to a separate screen in the starting hub, and they will overlap and dwarf each other if you don't take the time to tidy up the interface.
The game described here is VERMIN3000 DATAHEIST, available play in the browser or download from Itch. It was created by Vignettes and Nuts developer Paul Clarisse for game jam 7dfpswhich invites you to “challenge yourself and first-person gaming by creating a game that takes us to new places in new ways.” Be aware that VERMIN3000 contains abstract images of blood and suicide, as well as stunning images of Kate Perry singing “what a wonderful world.”
Porn films (there are three in total) consist of balls and hoops, spinning and squeaking together. It's the dirtiest thing I've seen since my lunch, which also consisted of balls and hoops tumbling and squeaking together.
This looks vaguely like an answer to Payment system crackdown on obscene video gamesbut Clarissa is a formidable smartass, and I'm afraid to put words in his mouth. The developer also has a blog where you will find essays such as “Craft Intelligence: What's the State of Artificial Intelligence”. The rest of this game jam looks like it's worth checking out as well.
