DEAR ABBY: Family reenters school and workplace after tragedy

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Dear Abby: Six months ago, my oldest child died in a terrible car accident. Our family went into a kind of hibernation for several months, grieving and trying to cope with the sadness of the situation.

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Now the children are back at school and I I'm starting to work again. I communicating with many people, I No seen before accident WHO May be Not know what happened. How should I respond when they ask perfectly reasonable questions like, “What’s new?” or “How was your break?” I want to be honest and tell people I No really ok. But I also want to avoid “trauma dumping” or giving them too much information that they may receive. No ready for.

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Everyone can hear the full truth. If I say something like, “We've been having some serious marital problems,” people tend to assume that I getting divorced or getting cancer, which changes how they interact with me. If I say Truth They almost always I start crying, which makes me cry, and then things go downhill. What can I do say it this is true and this too indicates do they really not want to know more? — TENNESSEE SURVIVOR

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DEAR SURVIVOR: Please accept my deepest condolences on the tragic loss of your firstborn son. If anyone asks what's happened new or like you, respond: “We've been through some trials and tribulations, but we're moving forward.” If you are questioned further, simply say, “I don't want to go into detail right now,” and change the subject.

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Dear Abby: Six months ago, my grandson “Levi”, 23, told his father (“Alex”) and me that he didn't want to be involved with us. Levi and his father got into an argument when Alex asked for help paying utilities since Levi and his girlfriend were living rent-free in Alex's house. Alex tried to contact Levi via text messages, but his messages were ignored. I tried sending text messages and emails, but also received no response.

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My son is not perfect, but he has always been a loving and devoted father. Levi means the world to him, and this alienation causes Alex problems with his physical and mental health. I always adored my grandson and was warm and kind to his girlfriend, so we Not understand why he also turned away from me. Should I keep trying to reach out or accept that Levi doesn't want me in his life? Please advise. — ASPITIVE GRANDMOTHER

DEAR GRANDMOTHER: Levi may be a young man, but He behaves like a spoiled child. His father's request that Levi cover the cost of utilities for free in the house where he lived. there wasn't unreasonably. I can only guess where he and his girlfriend live now and supposedly getting better deal.

Stop trying to reach out for help only to be rejected. When Levi grows up a little or needs more from you and his father, he will appear in your life again. Right now because Alex Not things are going well, focus on your son's health.

Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jean Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact dear Abby at DearAbby.com or PO Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.

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