DEAR ABBY: Annual birthday celebration has become burdensome

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Dear Abby: Both my parents' birthdays were within days of each other and were close to the holiday. About 35 years ago, they began the tradition of throwing a big party on or before their birthday. Me and my siblings have grown up. The guests were their friends and we were mostly bored. When we got married and had kids, we were invited to our friends' holiday parties, but we felt extremely guilty if we tried to skip our parents' party. The older they got, the more they expected from us, prepare and demolish it.

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My dad got sick a couple of years ago and recently passed away. The parties continued, although Dad could barely stay awake. Mom, 85, still insists it continues. Fewer guests are visiting due to age related issues. Some can no longer drive. The problem is that we do all the work. One sibling lives in another state, and his a long trip to arrive and work all the time. Their wife also has health problems.

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My siblings and I feel like we are done hosting such a big event every year. In fact, we just finished, period. How can we talk about this with mom? — MADE IN WASHINGTON

DEAR READY: I'm guessing that you and your siblings are planning to do SOMETHING with your elderly mother on her special day. Tell her through group or private chat that you love her, but the annual birthday party cannot continue because it has become too much for you, considering that you all have responsibilities to your families. Bye this event is celebrated, this shouldn't no matter how “grand” it is. Because her crowd of friends has diminished, maybe lunch You could also get a birthday cake in the restaurant.

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Dear Abby: I'm approaching retirement age (62) and while I'd like to start a second career, I'm finding that no one wants to hire a “granny.” Last week I was so upset after another unsuccessful interview that I threatened to give away my scrubs and clothes. deleted job postings from my email account.

I can't talk directly to potential employers because everything is done on a computer these days, and the computer very specific what it will take. I deleted The job dates are on my resume, but one company I interviewed with specifically asked me about them. I'm trying to break into the veterinary industry. I used to volunteer, starting at the bottom while working full time. I'm completely confused. Are youth really what they need? — BEGINNING EMPLOYER

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DEAR EMPLOYEE: In some cases, younger workers have an advantage over older ones due to age-based hiring practices. If you have had a good relationship with the staff at the veterinary practice where you volunteer, consider discussing your problem with them and asking if they can offer any information.

You may also want to contact your county Office on Aging and ask for information about employment opportunities for seniors. You may not be able to get your dream job, but you might be able to get something in a related field.

Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jean Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact dear Abby at DearAbby.com or PO Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.

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